Now, the key to giving a sincere compliment is understanding what comprises a sincere compliment. Sincere compliments are simple, timely and they are not premeditated.  A sincere compliment is also often given in the presence of others.

Keep your compliment simple and specific.  An extravagant compliment often sounds forced and reeks of insincerity.  Instead of gushing, pick out one specific achievement or item to compliment, say it and be done with it. Offering a compliment on a specific achievement instead of a sweeping generalization gives the illusion of paying close attention–something sincere people often do.

Be timely in offering your compliment. Waiting a week to offer a compliment on a specific achievement definitely shows that you probably weren’t paying close attention–at least, not until it was important for you to do so. For example it would be appropriate to compliment a project well done within a day or two of its completion, or the very next time you see the person. Or, if you’re going on a date, it’s important to compliment your date’s attire or look the moment you meet rather than halfway through dinner.

Speak from the heart (or at least make it seem like you are).  The more words you try to throw into a compliment means the more likely it won’t seem heartfelt. Basically, you’re giving yourself an awful lot of rope to hang yourself with when you start tacking on extra words. Here are a couple examples to help you distinguish. Good: You look amazing in that dress. Bad: I can’t believe how good you look in that dress, you sure do clean up nice, don’t you? Do you see where you could get yourself into some trouble with that bad example?

Make sure you leave a paper trail or have witnesses if possible. If a compliment is given when no one is around, is the compliment really given? No, it’s not because the recipient can always deny it later. Give the compliment in the form of a letter or email when warranted, or make sure you’re in a highly visible public place (or while in earshot of friends) so that the recipient of the compliment can feel extra special. Most people figure that you’re not going to blatantly lie in front of a bunch of people, so it adds to that veil of sincerity.

The art of giving a sincere compliment involves a number of factors.  Perhaps the most important thing to remember is that a sincere compliment stems from a genuine feeling of admiration. But, whenever that genuine feeling of admiration is absent, you at least have this plan to fall back on.

Here’s one final bit of advice if you’re actually trying to reconnect with someone: You want to make sure that you are sincere and not faking it. For more tips and information on how to properly get a love back, I’d recommend reading TW Jackson’s The Magic of Making Up.

Don’t get me wrong, your anger may be justified, but staying angry does no one any good in the long run. Taking the time to work through these emotions before offering forgiveness will help you to forget your partner’s words or actions. If you rush to offer forgiveness before you have had the opportunity to vent your own frustrations forgetting will be nearly impossible. You also need to understand the feelings of the person who offended you. Giving your partner the chance to express his side of the situation will give you a better understand of why he acted the way he did. It may turn out that everything was a misunderstanding and the pain was not caused intentionally.

Dealing with your own emotions in a calm and rational way. You may be justified, but reacting irrationally based on emotion will only serve to deepen the wounds between you and your partner. Give yourself a little time to manage your own feelings and collect your thoughts, and allow your partner the same courtesy, so that you both will be able to speak to one another calmly.

A crucial aspect of forgiving and forgetting is valuing your relationship more than you value being right in an argument. You may be right, but being right is not worth losing someone you care for. If you are able to put your love for your partner ahead of your ego, then you will be more willing to forgive and forget.

Finally you can never really forgive and forget unless you are truly willing to accept your partner’s apology. Harboring feelings that the apology isn’t genuine will damage the relationship because you will always harbor that doubt. Listen sincerely to your partner’s apology and have faith that the apology is heartfelt and genuine. Then let him know that you accept his apology and are willing to not let this situation interfere with your future interactions.

To think there’s a book out there that can help you reconnect with your ex lover is difficult to believe, but there is. The Magic of Making Up picks up the slack where most of those self help books and how to make the opposite sex fall in love with you instantly books leave off.

TW takes you by the hand and explains in a step by step way how you can work with your ex lover to build up a stronger relationship. He tells you how whether your relationship is salvageable (most are), what you shouldn’t do right after the break up, and what you should do to open the lines of communication.

Dry and difficult to read is not what the Magic of Making Up is. The flow of the book is phenomenal and easy to follow–basically, he doesn’t use any fancy words to hype himself up; he just gives you the goods in plain English.

But, you certainly don’t have to take my word for it. TW gets emails everyday from happy customers who’ve successfully used his techniques to rebuild their relationships…

Here’s a quick overview of the book:

• Chapter 1: Understanding Why Your Relationship Ended (and Why It’s Not Over Just Yet)
• Chapter 2: Don’t Panic–Your Key to Winning Back Love (Getting Your Head on Straight)
• Chapter 3: Removing the Splinter in Your Relationship (Where Do You Stand?)
• Chapter 4: Re-igniting the Spark of Passion and Desire (The Plan)
• Chapter 5: Dates and Lovers–How Other People Can Actually Bring You Back Together with Your Ex
• Chapter 6: Easing Back Into Your Relationship to Solidify Your Love
• Chapter 7: Maintaining the Fun and Love without Dredging Up Old Wounds
• Chapter 8: When Your Relationship Can’t Be Saved–Moving On with Grace

Not only do you get an easy to read and follow guide with a step by step plan explaining how to salvage your relationship, it also includes the Magic Second Chance Letter (a life saver when you figure out that sobbing and begging for a second chance doesn’t really work) and the Clean Slate Method (when it becomes apparent that you just need to start fresh and your hackneyed apologies just falls on deaf ears).

Typically, manuals such as these just deliver the information in such a boring way that you tune out within a few pages, but TW Jackson keeps it lively and down to earth. Definitely recommended if you’re currently going through a break up or feel that your relationship could use a little pick-me-up.

So, whenever you’re ready to repair your relationship and build it into something much stronger, then head over to the website and get The Magic of Making Up.